maternal projectiles

a day before mother's day another object flew towards me from my mother's hands. sounds scary, doesn't it? the hands that nurtured you are the same hands that would crush your heart. i really don't want to have entries as personal as this but let me just rant this out for my sanity's sake.

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objects can't fly on its own unless when they're from my angry mother's light hands. here, i'll list the things she had thrown at me since the start of this year:

-dipper and pail(tabo at balde) she didn't hit me though, but she threw these at my direction and broke the dipper(may galit talagah divah).

-2 pcs of banana and a tambis(aka bell fuit/water apple/syzygium aqueum) these things cant really hurt anybody but the act of throwing without a good reason made me bleed. but the gay in me finds this incident funny. machomphu-pa is the thai name of tambis plus the flying bananas (ang bakla divah? hehe)

this year lang ito mga kafatid. wla pa dito ang mga pinalipad niya nung previous years(hair brush, ballpen, cellfone, libro at etc etc)

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this summer i had my hair shaved (semikal lang actually kasi nga mainet). and so when i came back home for the elections my mom saw my new hair. to my shock, she was enraged by it. her claim was that i look like a criminal from prison and i was a fool to have my hair done that way. i explained my side citing the weather as my major reason and i even used words in english to stress my point. that was the time when the bananas went hurling. she said, being the mother i had no right to explain to her what is right for me because she knows best and she thinks i'm a gay fool. a few minutes after that, i broke down. i didn't saw that coming, not from my mother's mouth that is. good thing my father is always on my side. this was a day before mother's day.

rewind. the dipper and pail incident was when i wore a pink patrick starfish children's tshirt on holy week and i don't want to tell you the details. i can't even figure out why she did that.

more rewind. this was the conversation of my aunt and mother when i enrolled for my second year in college:

aunt: why do you have to travel with your son for enrollment? i think your son is already old enough and you would just stress yourself out. i don't even go with my children on their enrollment in college.

mama: i really don't trust him handling the money for the enrollment.

... and she said that in front of me. what the hell did i do to be stripped off of my mother's trust? ay ewan. she probably forgot about this conversation but it came to me like a bomb.

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now i'm thinking. why my mother is so... ummm... not friendly to me. probably...

-i did not turn out to be the ideal son that she wants (a son who is straight so she can have grandchildren and an ofw so the son can send money)

-she is on a menopausal stage(she's on her 40's)

-i'm not her real son (i'm just adding this for theatric reasons hehe)

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hmmm i think i've just written the reasons why i'm creating an illusion of the lady warrior seeking her mother on this blog. my love for her has probably faded but my respect is still there. belated happy mama's day mama!

fairygodflower says: tawagan na natin si tita charo.

bitchywitch says: mother knows best. eh pano kung ung "best" nya eh ung panahon pa ni manilyn reynes!?

hatred of the mother is familiar, but the mother's hatred still comes as a surprise.
Mason Cooley(1927 – July 25, 2002)